Listen

            Why do we miscommunicate? Why do we fail to really listen to what others are saying?  

Emotional reactions and filters on the part of the listener to what the talker is saying or even to the talker himself affect our thinking.  Filters are the lenses through which a person perceives the world, based upon his experiences and culture.  Many people need to win and have control over others in order to assuage insecurity and anxiety, which leads to attacking character and motives of others and defending ourselves against perceived attacks rather than discussing and resolving the actual issues.

            Because of many demands on my time and attention, I often find myself irritated by long-winded people, especially when it seems that there is no point to what is being said—talking to hear himself talk.  Having a reserved, quiet demeanor, I appear either laid back and calm--or lazy and unmotivated depending upon the perspective of the other person. I also have  a tendency in sensitive situations to not look at others because it affects my mental processing, which can be easily misinterpreted as a lack of caring or interest.  I can often be easy for a stronger personality to manipulate through emotional appeal or a seemingly logical case or even a threat into backing down.